The Great Rust

by The Grey Trust

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1.
Demolition 03:36
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DEMOLITION We’re all going to watch the wrecking crew Put all the charges in position Then watch my soul explode, watch me lose control Watch the demolition I can't help but feel I don't want to be here To live with this indecision So tear it to the ground and feel the hammer pound It's all over, demolition It’s all give and take but I’ve given you so much Neck deep, I’m drowning in suspicion No matter what it used to be you keep revising history So much demolition I can't help but think I don't want to be here I want to fly, but there's no ambition You've taken it apart and it's gone too far Too much demolition I dream that we can still come through Why won't you say it's true I’d still hold on I’d still lean on I’d still look To you But I can't help but feel I don't want be here To live in such submission So tear it to the ground and feel the hammer pound It's all demolition Demolition
2.
Face Value 04:00
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FACE VALUE I’m in a panic because I’ve forgotten which part I’m supposed to play My mind is frantic searching for the lines I’m supposed to say And all at once, nothing seems to make sense You say I know you, you recognize me but I’ve never seen you before You say I owe you but I don’t even know how to settle the score All at once, it seems that it's a mess Face to face at face value Are you really someone else Face to face at face value I don’t even know myself You keep changing and rearranging before I know where to stand Strangely putting on new faces that I just don’t understand I reach for you but you won't take my hand Face to face at face value It's enough to lose my mind Face to face at face value What else can I find? Take a good look around, tell me what you see Tell me about the things you want to feel Are they real? I know I’ll wake up, I’ve got to wake up from this nightmare that I’m in Before I break up, I’ve got to get out but I don't know where to begin I'd turn to you but you don’t let me in Face to face at face value Round and round we go See it all at face value Where no one seems to know Take it all at face value It’s never what it seems Face to face at face value Reality is a dream
3.
Blood in the Songs You Play 04:14
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BLOOD IN THE SONGS YOU PLAY In that moment between light and dark There’s a voice where yours belongs That melancholy alchemy My scars shouldn't sing these songs But your verses are a jail That emprison a romance Dead lungs can't exhale Dead hearts have no chance Blood in the songs you play (knock me to the floor) Blood in the words you say (knock me to the floor) My heart unwraps emotion Unfolding you betray Blood in the songs you play (knock me to the floor) You still want something but you’ve nothing to show You still want something but you're gonna go home You still want something and you end up going alone But if instead a kiss Slips stolen from your lips Could I keep it, Without your love, your love eclipsed Rushing on my sadness gets ready, Mind to chest to heart to soul, Caress me and it shocks Rock me and it rolls Blood in the songs you play (knock me to the floor) Blood in the words you say (knock me to the floor) Your words unwrap emotion Unfolding my dismay Blood in the songs you play (knock me to the floor) Pick me up and knock me to the floor Hold me till there’s no more
4.
Ghost 04:32
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GHOST Trying to find a way in We'd connect, and we'd shift Lying to find a way out We'd reject and we'd drift I've been walking the streets at night Trying to figure out my crime Hellos turn into unspoken goodbyes That fade as they’re left behind Now you're a shadow, a vision Burned in to remind You're a ghost, an apparition I'm the one who’s left behind Sleeping just holds the dream Everything disappears Staying awake just keeps you here But doesn't mute the tears Nothings wrong, but nothing's right Daylight's been resigned What stings the most is what changes hope Discarded and left behind Like you've left me behind You're a shadow, a vision Burned in to remind You're a ghost, an apparition I'm the one you’ve left behind Now you're a shadow, a vision Forever in my mind A spirit for my condition I’m the one who’s left Left Behind The last time I held your face You asked me not to leave While you slowly slipped away I stayed cause I believed Now it's the memories that fade away With all that they contain But you refuse to be forgotten If I dream, then you remain It's the dream that remains You're a shadow, a vision Burned in to remind You're a ghost, an apparition I'm the one who’s left behind Now you're a shadow, a vision Forever in my mind Haunting my disposition While I'm the one who’s left behind Left Behind
5.
Here 04:05
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HERE Even though you push away You hold me close and let me stay And while your mind is somewhere else You tell me you're afraid You want me to go but you need me all the same Staring at an empty space Up on the wall I see your face My thoughts are somewhere else They won't let go I want to leave but I need you all the same I feel your heartbeat as it's spinning out of sight I hear you whisper but it's fading in the night I never thought you'd turn to fly I never thought you'd want to hide You slipped away And left me here Holding on to what I thought We had with everything I've got And now I'm left just standing in the rain It's time to go but I can't get past the pain I hold my breath just waiting for a sign I hear your voice but it's a memory inside I never thought you'd turn away I never thought I'd hear you say You're so alone When you left me here I can tell you anything at all But you can't hear what I'm trying to say In between the thoughts that passed Between us I can feel your burn When I reach out to touch you Just to hold you close I feel your heartbeat as it's bending out of sight I hear your whisper but it's fading from the light I never thought you'd question why I never dreamed I'd see you cry I'm still here
6.
Identical Strangers 04:16
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IDENTICAL STRANGERS Checking my reflection in a window on the street There’s a stranger staring back at me his face is incomplete I think I recognize him I’ve seen him once before A momentary lapse into a world that I’ve ignored There’s a woman right behind me looking past my face She's fixing up the makeup that she managed in her haste She’s just like all the people I see every day (One by one by one they come, they never go away) Life is full of identical strangers We all look and feel and laugh the same Looking at a world of identical strangers I just wonder if we feel identical pain We’ve got identical houses on identical streets Identical jobs in identical suites We’ve got identical wives and lovers and cars And we drink the same drinks in identical bars We’ve got identical problems, identical dreams We even conform to identical schemes You can tell me about your day at work, I’ll tell you all about mine If we both try to talk at once maybe we'd save some time Life is full of identical strangers We all look and feel and laugh the same Looking at a world of identical strangers I just wonder if we feel identical pain We’d all like to feel we are somewhat unique, Our differences keep us alive But human nature is an identical streak Running through our everyday lives It doesn’t really matter what dance you do, It doesn’t really matter what you say Makes no difference if you don’t see my point of view, Underneath we’re all the same I understand you’re not feeling well perhaps you’re just depressed With everything that’s going on we’re all a little stressed Your doctor said the same as mine we’d better get some rest We’ve got identical diseases from identical pests We can try to find the answers while we’re searching for the cure Whatever’s got you down has got me too I’m sure Is it so surprising that we both feel the same I’ve known you for so long but I still don’t know your name Life is full of identical strangers We all laugh and cry the same Life is full of identical strangers We all hope and dream the same Life is full of identical strangers We all look and feel the same Looking at a world of identical strangers I just wonder if we feel identical pain
7.
Hole in My Head 03:10
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HOLE IN MY HEAD Sitting here looking at the shadows inside Staring at the wall I just can’t hide Is there something here I can’t decide Tell me you lost me, don't tell me you tried. Got a hole in my head, my dream's on the floor Got visions of you, you're not there anymore Did you mean to tease me this way Did you mean to leave me this way Sitting here thinking hard trying to find All the little pieces that are left to remind All the little pieces that you left behind That tell me it's over, and tell me I'm blind Got a hole in my head, my dream’s on the floor Got visions of you but it seems like there’s more Did you mean to treat me this way Did you mean to leave me this way Got a hole in my head Too many voices competing for space Too many choices completing your face Too many lines, too hard to erase The emptiness you left me that I just can't replace I got a hole in my head, and everything's red I got a hole in my head, am I better off... Sitting here looking at the shadows inside Staring at the wall I just can’t hide Is there nothing here I can’t decide Tell me you lost me, don't tell me you lied Got a hole in my head, my dream's on the floor Got suspicions of you but just wanted more Did you mean to need me this way Did you mean to leave me this way Got a hole in my head, and everything's red Got a hole in my heart, am I better off... Got a hole in my heart, it only hurts if I’ve bled
8.
Lost in Your Love 03:24
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LOST IN YOUR LOVE Looking out my window The city's down below I wonder if you're out there I wonder where you'd go Maybe I've held you much too close Maybe I've left too much exposed Now I'm just lost in your love I can't help shake off the feeling That this is how it all ends Is this where we both get off this ride And never make our amends Maybe you've seen too much in me Maybe you've put your trust in me Now you're just lost in my love Looking at your eyes indite Couldn't see what they implied Wouldn’t hear you say that it’s all right Couldn’t face what we denied Maybe we didn't realize That this is what kept us both alive As we got lost in our love Looking out my window I see the lights down below I wonder if you're still here I wonder if you've let go 
Maybe I've held you much too close Maybe I've let my feelings show Now I'm just lost in your love Lost in your love
9.
Afraid to Bleed 03:47
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AFRAID TO BLEED I look at you when you're not here I talk to you when you can't hear I tell you things to hide my fear But the cuts are deep and never disappear You are all I need I'm afraid to bleed A difference won't make the circle square And pain just makes a better prayer Your kiss has left an empty space In my heart and on my face You are all I need I'm afraid to bleed Unspoken words they seem withdrawn A part of you has left, now they're gone A thousand blameless lines left unsaid Unspoken words they seem so wrong A part of me has left, now they're gone A thousand faultless lines never read Be perfect now, it's just too late I'll close my eyes my dreams can wait Before you say goodnight, stay awhile Before you fade away, let me smile You are all I need But I'm afraid to bleed
10.
Goodbye 03:57
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GOODBYE Just can't reconcile it all These feelings deep inside I think of you and I see the wall But I don't want to hide It's such a bad connection There's nothing coming through It's such a mad deception Wondering was it true Now it's goodbye I think of all the hours we spent Talking long into the night Sharing secrets we never meant To come out into the light Such a bruised reflection Emotions never showed Such confused perception Did you really know That this is goodbye Distances are bridged by close separation Behind an uncertain veneer Perhaps it's a result of resigned desperation Giving in to what you fear Now it's goodbye I think of all the times we spent Debating different points of view Turning unwelcome sentiment Into a passion we never knew It's such a strained connection This message I get from you Such a strange deception I still wonder if it's true But it's goodbye

about

The Grey Trust
Stefán Örn Arnarson, cello


The first album from The Grey Trust, The Great Rust is an alternative adult pop/rock song cycle that explores loss, breakup, and isolation connected by a metaphorical idea that relationships can oxidize over time.

Written and produced by Mark Zaki, the ten songs on this record are a combination of older revisited songs that were originally for film and theater projects dating back to the 1990s, and new songs composed especially for this record.

The Great Rust was written in Princeton, Los Angeles, and Sheffield (UK), and was recorded between May 2016 and February 2017 at Zaki's personal Studio Z in Princeton, NJ, and at the Rutgers Electroacoustic Lab in Camden, NJ.

The Grey Trust is a vehicle for Zaki's commercial and side projects ("an eclectic collective with no muse unturned"). Future projects in the works include artpop/electronica, progressive experimental, and electro-jazz recordings.

credits

released September 1, 2017

©2017 Mark Zaki/ZAKI Intermedia
Meantone Music (BMI)

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